This song may not mean to the artist the same thing it does to me but I feel it describes me. There are things about my relationship with my wife that make me sad (want to cry) when we are close. But being away from her is worse (wanting to die). I think this song is about a love that regardless if you stay or go it will stop your heart (code blue)
I'm almost certain that it's about heroin addiction.
Verse one is pre-first use. Things are fine, but looking for something exciting which is the light, knowing that it could go wrong. The candle is the flame under the spoon prepping the drug, she showing the way is show him how to do it. The bell is in one's head, aka 'it hit me' or 'it came to me' that ...
I always felt that it was referring to
“the destination” everyone yearns
to be at in their life or the place of your deepest
desires and dreams. Like becoming world
famous in a rock & roll band or whatever-
and when you get finally get there- it is NOT
what you expected or even ever really wanted.
And there’s no way out once you get there.